I have never thought of I am a man with little faith. I feel that I can stand firm on my ground and will not get affected by any worldly matter. Vice versa, in fact I feel that I am weak and also close to despair when matters strike me. I am not as strong as what I think. I have never face death and hence I am not afraid of death.What if someone points a gun at you, will I stand firm on my faith? I am not too sure now. Despair is a disease. Despair will erode your faith slowly.
I pray to God that he will guide me through my path and sometimes the lesson of patience is not easy. I do not have much patience. I describe myself as a person who is in doubts, impatience and slightly hot temper. I do not like to lose control but I am not a freak. I understand a person can never control everything in his life.
I have been praying that the house can be sold and I still have a buyer who is going to sign the legal document this morning. I am not entirely sure whether this is going to happen or not. See, I am a man of little faith. Last night, I prayed to the Lord that to grant me strength to go through this. If that is his will, please provide me the strength to anchor me and give me faith to see what is unseen. I know he has a plan and I just pray that I have enough courage to walk through that.
I am wounded by financial difficulties and I know I am very afraid of falling into such state again. I am not greedy, I am just wishing to provide the best as I can for my family.
In Philippians 4:4, Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
In 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
These are three verses which I came across this morning. Somehow, his words grant me peace and I feel better. I am not totally out yet but I trust that my Lord will walk through the path with me. I feel that the Lord is teaching me how to be patience. Like what God ordered Elijah to hide in the Kerith Ravine. (1 Kings 17:2-4) Kerith Ravine is desolate or separation from main area. I feel like God wants me to depend on him in Kerith Ravine, waiting for his commands. We have an evangelistic service and spirit convocation coming along this weekend. I want to prepare my heart and soul to serve him better. I must remove doubts from here so that I can better equip. O Father, help me through this so that I can serve you with no anxious. Amen.
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